Edit this line - tl;Dr be creative in hard times if you can.
Just want to remind you, bud.
I know you’re dealing with -ish…
Also, I agree with outlets. Having an outlet, a hobby, anything creative, at any level is a helpful resource to times extreme. Obviously, as long as you’re able to continue them.
I went through a mid-20’s thing, myself.
I don’t think I’ve ever really talked about it but it was around the moment I came into music. Id never made music, but I’d done things I liked doing, like doodling. I would draw one-frame cartoons of people I knew “dealing” with shit, I made up characters, etc…just poor attempts at being creative and taking my mind off shit.
The initial issue was when I was 19, I suffered a spine injury. I blew out my L3 vertebrae. I’m fused together, was nearly paralysed. I was lucky enough the injury happened in an outward motion, leaving my spinal cord in tact and motorized. That cost me 2+ years of my life, healing.
Besides healing, gaming and social aspects, I didn’t have anything to keep myself in check. My brain was rampant with bad thoughts, ideas and generally didn’t shut off. Gaming, while I dove into it head first, when that waivered I was left with quiet times that just made me feel horrible about myself.
My friends were starting their careers, getting married and having children. I was lacking…my ups were up and my downs, they were horrible.
As a result, at one point I was able to build a computer. I was receiving a portion of my initial income in benefits. I can explain workers comp, as it was a work injury but meh…
I took some of that and managed to build my first PC. It was a budget build but it played shit. Before that I was playing ps2 and socom on broadband. I had finally done the comp thing.
Without intent, I learned by stepping outside myself, I could do things. I built a PC on my own, with limited internet intervention.
I sorted out old anime vids like cowboy Bebop vid and would make things in that vein. Like music videos, with random clips. Was so fun. Terrible, spoiler ridden things but it was an outlet …making music was shortly thereafter. Editing music to fit clips, etc.
From there, without going year by year…I looked for outlets on creativity. As a kid I lived to doodle, draw, paint. I would listen to songs and write my own lyrics…though they’d be much more self depricating, I enjoyed.
I came across Sony Acid and used it to do NIN remixes, no idea wtf was happening…but it was the best thing I ever did. From there, it led me here. And while most of everyone hasn’t or doesn’t listen to my music for whatever reason, I’ve been able to extend my habit. My output of creativity that’s actually taken me away from depression, a horrid place or places in my life, to somewhere I can income my mind.
While I do it privately, I’m sure I annoy people with WiPs because I still get too excited about the process. I just can’t help it.
I’m sorry for rambling and I probably got some of it wrong. If there are ?s I can answer but I’m a huge fan of this, good or bad, being an amazing outlet for horrid thoughts.