The Off-Topic Thread


i’m doing my best. but i am suffering tremendously. i’m closing out the new year- if anyone reads anything i say as slightly offensive, ignorant, or creating an atmosphere of negativity from the dates of 12/01/2023-01/01/2024 from this ip take me out of the equation.

i’m getting drunk and lit and it feels great to go out with a bang. 2023 changed me deeply and i wouldn’t have been able to be who i am without idmF. but i know i also do really stupid really ignorant really self-obsessed really twisted things when i’m drunk. like- rant about pointless shit and randomly unintentionally ignorantly insult an artist or the ENTIRE netlabel cuz in that second i’m trying to convey a message. this is who i am and i may not be around for the first few days of 2024. (on idmF)

but before i get too twisted i wanted to offer a cease-fire and apologize for any negative hateful offensive things i may have said in december. i’m out here with a target on my back and i do stupid stuff with my free time. i’m 34 (i think)

the netlabel functions SEPARATELY from the IDMf community.

^^^^ that’s the correct spelling of IDMf.

i’m bored now so i’m working on making evertything correct and functioning. i’m just really struggling. IDMf changed the game for me. and i will never forget that. but i gotta put my life first. my irl matters MORE than IDMf. i’m not going to prison for anyone on here EVER. none of you pay my rent. so whatever terrible disturbed or insulting shit i “say” (not that anything i ever do is)- point is if you get my point. my point is when the internet goes down and we all go dark. we’re no longer friends until we meet in person . and that’s ever. does that make sense? i’m trying to explain my bill situation and my hope that 2024 is a beautiful year. - this is where i ended up drunk ranting. does any of this make sense? cuz idk. i’m slipping into an alcohol coma now. and i wish everyone the best. all of you IDMf’er’s out there alone in the dark doing your beautiful things musically and spritually. THANK YOU IDMf for a beautiful 2023. i hope to see you all on the 2024 spectrum soon. and if not- don’t sell yourself short. you got HERE. YOU- YOU got to IDMf. no one held a gun to your head to come back here. so whoever’s left, and whoever is running shit now- thank you. i’m not capable of separating my emotions and my business. i’m not that guy- it all gets blended together 96% of the time with alcohol and fatigue. but for those semi-stable individuals who are still out there supporting IDMf and working towards keeping the netlabel and community alive. i gotta go- thank you for everything you do thank you so much i apologize for being a drunk and i apologize for being weak. and i am sorry i put my irl first it’s not fair. enjoy 2024 everyone idk when i’m gonna be on next but i’m getting over a 15 day flu. i hope hoever reads this knows not to stop making music and i alwso hope that whoever has the money to keep idmF alive that it actually matters. it’s not much- but it’s US. WE. US. we are together and i want 2024 to become a focal point for IDMf. let’s stop being afraid of what is. let’s except us and move on. IDMf is no longer what we once were. let’s move on and anything hateful or ignorant is said about the netlabel drunk and broke i apologize for. i do dirt- that’s how i see it- when shit hits the fan irl “i do dirt” - i’m working on this 2024. let’s accept & move on. (not ME- the netlabel)---- “i’m more of capable of separating feelings”— check it- merry christmas & HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERONE!!!. now i’m gonna go get more drunk and work on my music before i call the maintenance team to fix my apt from the fucked state it is. and cry over my coworker. thanks everyone we all did what we could this year. 2024 let’s do better and stronger. let’s try our best to better ourselves & our community (IDMf). and if not or if i’m not presenent. thank you. or something i’m too gone now haoppy 2024


aside from me not having anyone wanting to associate with me after my previous post. i wanted to wish IDMf a very happy New Year from america! HAPPY 2024 EVERYONE!!!


posts like this keep me going




banked on a hoe again. got burned. now i’m all alone again


explain to me why again we are all edgar allen poe’s? i forget what the point of this all is. we are expected to accomplish something. and yet i have not accomplished anything. am i supposed to present my suffering to the world so that in 75 years i can be remembered as an important piece of electronic music? or are we supposed to be doing something constructive in the current moment that involves video software and youtube? or are we supposed to find a community of like-minded individuals who create for the sole purpose of creation? or for the sole purpose of love? or … i mean i really don’t get this. i’m trying to create meaning out of my suffering, but am worried i am going about this incorrectly- are - is everyone using youtube? am i supposed to be on twitch live streaming my suffering? is this a sex thing? is this like a fallout of tumblr? am i supposed to be TWEETING on tumblr? am i supposed to go t 4CHAN? IS tiktok enough? am i doing this right? — i mean i am all on board with genuine suffering- but am i supposed to broadcast my suffering? like is this a thing? should i follow MRBEAST on youtube? i mean simon whistler seems to keep up on the trends- are artists these days suffering? and are we supposted to broadcast this? i could use some guideance i am kinda lost. i emailed my hero. asked him to add me on tiktok- am i missing something? should i be going to music reviewers for exposure? i don’t know what a community is anymore. 2024 idk what a community means.


i’m really trying here- like i - . … i can’t help my community right now. IDMf. i can’t support them. i stopped my meds and am spiraling into absolute chaos. i’m not suicidal or in danger of being homeless. but birthdays and holidays are not doing goodl… this is multi-monthly. am i freaking out? do i sound coherent? i start back my meds tomorrow but just am not sure if i’m supposed to just keep living on and document my life? or am i supposed to be trying to help fellow musicians on tiktok? who should i be trusting? because all i trust is on IDMforums. but i don’t trust anything else. should i listen to any fan that sends me a message? should i ignore everyone and just focus on my rent? am i supposed to stop taking my meds and bec- yeah fuck that. fuck that last one. is anyone even on twitch from IDMf>? what the fuck am i even doing?


Just signed up. I probably won’t stream because I have absolutely zero incentive to do so (and nobody will watch anyway), but I wanted to see if there was anything cool going on over there… and pretty much everything that piqued my interest was down in the < 5 watchers category, usually verging on 0.

The saturation kind of sucks, so I know what you mean. Twitch should just change its name to ‘hot tub bikini time’, because that’s where it looks like most of the watchers are whenever I’m on.

Post your shit and I’ll follow and probably actually watch. I’m always looking for raw jams and most of the music on twitch (or at least at night, when I’m on) is just half-assed bullshit


Pro tip: Make her orgasm multiple times…

Shell come back.

Also dont feelings all over the place that is a turn off.


Read a bunch of stoic philosophy…order epictetus marcus aurelius and seneca books on amazon…

Reading Stoic philosophy is the best therapy self help you can give yourself imo…

Also find the source that is causing you to act out…and confront yourself about it…no woe is me or pondering what ifs…do what you gotta due…

Like if your stressing about a relationship…have new experiences…if its your situation…stop putting off what you got to take care immediately…come up with plans or options if things dont work out…

Just do what you gotta do…dont make excuses. :slightly_smiling_face:


i’m really lost right now. i’m not stable at all despite what i tell myself. i haven’t felt “grounded” … since … jesus i don’t even know. last time i had a handle on my music and wanted to make an ep. jesus. through a embarrassing breakup. that was like 2022


i don’t know about any of you guys but sampling- finding the correct key. that is difficult. i just use my ear i NEVER use text audio files (“key of gmin 120bpm”)- i just use my ear cuz 90% of the time that shit fucks up and is in the incorrect key and not set to alter via samples. so i just use my music theory knowledge and sing the notes. there’s alot of ppl who are lighting fires about POGO. that he’s homophobic and transphobic and maybe racist. all i can think about is that i work tomorrow and am not taking care of myself. i’m in a pretty dark place. i feel like i haven’t slept peacefully since 2022


i wake up after 2 hrs of sleep and can’t go back to sleep- i stay up for 3 hrs and then pass out for an hour- almost oversleep for work- and then panic. this has been my cycle for 18 months


I AM NOT “FUMBLING AROUND IN MY ROOM I AM RECORDING THE WOMAN I’M WORKING WITH “FUMBLING AROUND” IN HER ROOM” - fuck. i’m never gonna escape work. i’m gonna genuinely die. this all goes back to my FUCKING parents. if i wasn’t raised to believe i was a god i would NEVER treat life like i was a god. and i grew up. and realized i’m not a god. and i hate my fucking family for doing this to me. but without my family i would be permanently in jail. without a home. without an income. without hope. all i would have is my music. funny how that sounds like the story - fucking just end it all now- i am so fucking embarassed to have been raised like this. it’s like i have been in limbo since 2009. my entire relationship was built upon lies. i gotta go i just got triggered and am freaking tf out. i want to see the planet die permanently and a select few go to mars and just end everything permanently. nothing deserves


i wouldn’t be narcissistic, manipulative, neglectful, ignorant, selfish- i would be a nice fucking person instead of pretending to be a nice fucking person. hate myself i miss boxxy


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Lara croft

Are better male/ female archetypes aka fictional role models…than most…