"Can't polish a turd" myth - Page 3
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Old 13-08-2015, 08:52 PM   #41
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

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Originally Posted by Jaded View Post
I don't know either man. I kinda feel like things are heading towards talking about our feels...
So, this is the time to confess my unrequited love for Unregistered?

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Old 14-08-2015, 10:47 AM   #42
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

if you give a music producer a turd, he's going to ask for a glass of snot. When you give him the snot, he'll probably ask you for a dick. When he's finished, he'll ask you for a dildo. Then he'll want to look in a mirror to make sure he doesn't have a cum mustache. When he looks in the mirror, he might notice his pubic hair needs a trim. So he'll probably ask for a pair of nail knives. When he's finished giving himself a trim, he'll want a broom to sweep it up. He'll start sweeping. He might get carried away and sweep every room in the house. He may even end up fratboying the floors as well! When he's done, he'll probably want to take a nap. You'll have to fix up a little box for him with a blanket and a pillow. He'll crawl in, make himself comfortably acid trip and fluff the pillow a few times. He'll probably ask you to read him a story about the kkk. So you'll read to him from one of your books, and he'll ask to see the pictures. When he looks at the pictures, he'll get so excited he'll want to draw one of his own. He'll ask for paper and crayons. He'll draw a picture. When the picture is finished, he'll want to sign his name with his dick. Then he'll want to hang his dying grandma from his shoe laces. Which means he'll need Scotch. He'll hang up his sexy relative and stand back to look at them thinking about last Christmas. Looking at the refrigerator will remind him that he's thirsty... for blood. So... he'll ask for a glass of stuff this up your ass. And chances are if he asks you for a glass of that, he's going to want a turd to go with it. fucking socialist.
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Old 14-08-2015, 03:42 PM   #43
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

That Mythbusters video isn't actually polishing a turd, it's first destroying the form of the turd and then moulding it into something smooth and dense enough to polish.

I think you could polish a petrified turd, the older the better. But at what point do you say the turd is no longer a turd and merely the fossil of a turd?

Pretty much everything you'd need to do to polish a turd separates the actual polish from the actual turd to some degree. Varnishing before polishing means you're polishing the varnish, you're creating a veneer. Compressing the turd at great temperatures could create a diamond, which you could certainly polish, but that diamond is certainly no longer a turd.

That said, you could give your mother an artificial diamond made from a turd without upsetting her. So in your face, Jaded.

Kubric is said to have retorted that "you can (polish a turd) if you freeze it." I'm not sure about that, certainly it would depend on the temperature and how much friction is involved in the polishing process. Also chemical reactions and the ambient temperature of the polish. More research is needed.

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Old 14-08-2015, 07:56 PM   #44
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

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So, this is the time to confess my unrequited love for Unregistered?

GROSS
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Old 16-08-2015, 04:27 AM   #45
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

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Originally Posted by banewaker View Post
if you give a music producer a turd, he's going to ask for a glass of snot. When you give him the snot, he'll probably ask you for a dick. When he's finished, he'll ask you for a dildo. Then he'll want to look in a mirror to make sure he doesn't have a cum mustache. When he looks in the mirror, he might notice his pubic hair needs a trim. So he'll probably ask for a pair of nail knives. When he's finished giving himself a trim, he'll want a broom to sweep it up. He'll start sweeping. He might get carried away and sweep every room in the house. He may even end up fratboying the floors as well! When he's done, he'll probably want to take a nap. You'll have to fix up a little box for him with a blanket and a pillow. He'll crawl in, make himself comfortably acid trip and fluff the pillow a few times. He'll probably ask you to read him a story about the kkk. So you'll read to him from one of your books, and he'll ask to see the pictures. When he looks at the pictures, he'll get so excited he'll want to draw one of his own. He'll ask for paper and crayons. He'll draw a picture. When the picture is finished, he'll want to sign his name with his dick. Then he'll want to hang his dying grandma from his shoe laces. Which means he'll need Scotch. He'll hang up his sexy relative and stand back to look at them thinking about last Christmas. Looking at the refrigerator will remind him that he's thirsty... for blood. So... he'll ask for a glass of stuff this up your ass. And chances are if he asks you for a glass of that, he's going to want a turd to go with it. fucking socialist.

Weird the version of this I read before had a mouse and a cookie.
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Old 16-08-2015, 04:36 AM   #46
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

This thread is really...

How to think and talk like a 14-year-old.
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Old 16-08-2015, 06:18 AM   #47
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

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Originally Posted by Muse-ic View Post

How to think and talk like a 14-year-old.
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Old 16-08-2015, 09:56 PM   #48
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

Love the turd and polish that shit into brightness.

Like all my samples and pre mixing stuff is pretty turd, cause I can't play guitar or sing properly or even play in time, most layers alone sound fairly uninteresting, the process of making it sound good is what music is about as I see it and for that there are many tools to work with.

Last edited by Crude_beats; 17-08-2015 at 12:16 AM..
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Old 16-08-2015, 09:58 PM   #49
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

Can't russian a turd.
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Old 17-08-2015, 12:14 AM   #50
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

"Can't Greek a turd"


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Old 17-08-2015, 04:38 AM   #51
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

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Originally Posted by Muse-ic View Post
This thread is really...

How to think and talk like a 14-year-old.

what's it like being really mature? give us some insight from the other side
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Old 17-08-2015, 05:26 AM   #52
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

I have no clue, I was just kidding.
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Old 17-08-2015, 08:34 AM   #53
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

I was being serious, you're super mature
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Old 17-08-2015, 10:31 AM   #54
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

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Originally Posted by banewaker View Post
what's it like being really mature? give us some insight from the other side
It's pretty fucking awesome, thanks for asking!

Most days you get to look down on all the little peasant people and be all like 'damn, you're immature'. That is a crazy good burn that never gets old for us.

Some days our maturity is at full peak and we go off the rails with sayings like. 'Yo dude, you're totally being so immature right now'.

If they try to talk back then you start doing an impatient foot shuffling movement, several head rolls, shoulder shrugs, and follow it all with an eye roll.

<------ That right there is how you say 'Look here you immature little fuck rag, everything you say is beneath me and always will be. I am the fucking man! You should grovel before my presence and whiff my odor with graceful happiness.

Just a little insight from the other side
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Old 17-08-2015, 10:45 AM   #55
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

Sometimes my head is so far in the clouds, I have to spit just so I can tell which way is down
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Old 17-08-2015, 10:54 AM   #56
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

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Originally Posted by rewir3d View Post
It's pretty fucking awesome, thanks for asking!

Most days you get to look down on all the little peasant people and be all like 'damn, you're immature'. That is a crazy good burn that never gets old for us.

Some days our maturity is at full peak and we go off the rails with sayings like. 'Yo dude, you're totally being so immature right now'.

If they try to talk back then you start doing an impatient foot shuffling movement, several head rolls, shoulder shrugs, and follow it all with an eye roll.

<------ That right there is how you say 'Look here you immature little fuck rag, everything you say is beneath me and always will be. I am the fucking man! You should grovel before my presence and whiff my odor with graceful happiness.

Just a little insight from the other side
No, that's the description of this---->

Even though you are wrong, definitely funny.
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Old 17-08-2015, 04:28 PM   #57
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

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Originally Posted by Kvlt O))) View Post
Sometimes my head is so far in the clouds, I have to spit just so I can tell which way is down
If you spit in the sky, it I'll fall down in your eye. Seen?
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Old 17-08-2015, 05:28 PM   #58
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

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Originally Posted by rewir3d View Post

'Look here you immature little fuck rag, everything you say is beneath me and always will be. I am the fucking man! You should grovel before my presence and whiff my odor with graceful happiness.
I need to print stickers of this...some of my colleagues syllabai need this addendum to properly reflect their teaching style.
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Old 17-08-2015, 07:44 PM   #59
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

depends on the quality of the turd. different turds require different polishings

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Old 17-08-2015, 09:32 PM   #60
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Re: "Can't polish a turd" myth

You can polish your turds with vitamin C. Top it off with some prune juice in extreme cases.

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