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Old 04-08-2017, 07:35 AM   #1
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wtf

just found out my eldest son died from an o.d.yea what an example i have made.
i got nuthin.but cryin.like a baby.i did this.its my fault.my boy gone before me.

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Old 04-08-2017, 10:14 AM   #2
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Re: wtf

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rixtr View Post
just found out my eldest son died from an o.d.yea what an example i have made.
i got nuthin.but cryin.like a baby.i did this.its my fault.my boy gone before me.
Speechless Rixtr! you have my full condolences and sympathy. In my thoughts and prayers.

Ive PMd you an article...I can do very little to help your grieving and guilt, but really hold yourself together for your sake, your family and you sons memory. I don't know you or your family personally, but I know grief and bereavement, it is dark and confusing. Be strong for those around you and find support in those you can trust.

Peace to you and your rested son my friend, wishing you all the best to find the path back to the light.

Last edited by MFXxx; 05-08-2017 at 08:37 AM..
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Old 04-08-2017, 01:28 PM   #3
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Re: wtf

Shit Rix, that's how my little bro checked out. I have no idea how you must be feeling, but I know it sucks. Hope you have friends or family nearby to bring you some food.

Take care of yourself man.
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Old 04-08-2017, 02:55 PM   #4
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Re: wtf

Shit.... saying that I am sorry to hear that is like 10x not strong enough man. I can only poorly imagine how difficult this is to take in for you. Ditto what Jaded said, keep some food in you and keep healthy for the those that still need you, including yourself.

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Old 04-08-2017, 03:14 PM   #5
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Re: wtf

I'm short of words, sorry Rixtr. Try not to be too hard on yourself, quite sure it was not your fault.

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Old 04-08-2017, 04:44 PM   #6
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Re: wtf

You have my deepest sympathy. Many may not understand what you are going thru right now, and we may not seem like much help at this point, but you are not alone and we are here for you. Please remember it is NOT your fault... we all learn by ALL our society... and our own mistakes. and some folks take time to learn and grow. I don't know your belief system but I choose to believe, we choose to come here and learn... and then our body dies, and we return to source with those lessons. He will be back of course, although you may not know this.

nothing truly dies in the universe, the universe wastes nothing. everything simply, transforms.

energy can never be created nor destroyed, remember, life is a cycle and death is just the beginning. ive been there, on that "other side" and i can tell you personally, you need not stress or feel sorrow for him. He is at peace... eternally. We are all going to go to the same place... remember. we love you, and we love him. we are connected.

may you find peace and loving memories in your time of sorrow and morning.

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Old 04-08-2017, 05:01 PM   #7
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Re: wtf

So sorry for your loss!
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Old 04-08-2017, 05:14 PM   #8
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Re: wtf

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lotus_Jewel View Post
ive been there, on that "other side" and i can tell you personally, you need not stress or feel sorrow for him.
Ditto. I promise you, you have nothing to worry about. I hope that can help you some.

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Old 04-08-2017, 06:26 PM   #9
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Re: wtf

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rixtr View Post
just found out my eldest son died from an o.d.yea what an example i have made.
i got nuthin.but cryin.like a baby.i did this.its my fault.my boy gone before me.
Shit, man.

Sending you a PM.

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Old 05-08-2017, 07:56 AM   #10
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Re: wtf

So sorry to hear that Rixtr.
You have my deepest sympathies, as I'm sure you do from all our regular IDMfers.
Don't push us away man, we're here for you if you need us and we can help.
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Old 05-08-2017, 10:29 AM   #11
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Re: wtf

I'm so sorry for your loss.
But please stay strong and don't blame yourself.
As a father of two you have my deepest and sincere sympathies.

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Old 05-08-2017, 06:35 PM   #12
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Re: wtf

I do not know what to say.

I`m thinking about you.
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Old 05-08-2017, 09:25 PM   #13
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Re: wtf

Condolences my brother!

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Old 06-08-2017, 12:11 AM   #14
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Re: wtf

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Words fail me, but my heart goes out to you and your family.

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Old 06-08-2017, 09:03 AM   #15
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Re: wtf

I'm really sorry to hear it man. I hope you're doing okay honestly.

And I'm glad you feel and know you can talk about it here.
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Old 06-08-2017, 05:48 PM   #16
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Re: wtf

youll have to pardon me i m drop some f bombs.it should be me,not my kid.wtf.i fucked up most of my life,did the wrong things did some fucked up shit.did some prison time.my son did none of that.fuck,fuck fuckfuck.man wtf
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Old 06-08-2017, 06:05 PM   #17
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Re: wtf

My condolences. I'm so sorry to hear that. Being a parent, I simply cannot imagine the pain. So awful.

The world seems like a much scarier place than when I was young. This is happening to good kids who are not even involved in the drug world.

All the best to you and your family.
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Old 06-08-2017, 07:20 PM   #18
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Re: wtf

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rixtr View Post
youll have to pardon me i m drop some f bombs.it should be me,not my kid.wtf.i fucked up most of my life,did the wrong things did some fucked up shit.did some prison time.my son did none of that.fuck,fuck fuckfuck.man wtf
Hang in there, R..regardless of what you did or didn't do, this tragedy is not your fault..no matter how much you might feel that it is, trust me. What you're going through and feeling right now is normal, but it's not true..it's just the early stages of grief, so please try to remember this if you can.

Don't be a stranger..you know how to reach me, buddy..if you want or need to, OK?

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Rixtr (11-08-2017)
Old 06-08-2017, 08:43 PM   #19
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Re: wtf

Rixtr, it's not your fault. So sad to hear of this stuff. Please see an individual talk therapist/psychologist right away. They can help you through this grief so it's not overwhelming. The drugs are a bad scene for sure. My town has a lot of grief because of the overabundance of drugs here too. I stay sober, but a lot of us have lost others to the scourge.

You are still a decent guy; the trauma is deep but you can get through this, man!
I believe in you! Condolences.

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Old 07-08-2017, 01:11 AM   #20
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Re: wtf

I can't even start to imagine how it feels, Rixtr. As distant as I am, it's already quite the shock. I feel deeply for you and all my thoughts go to you and all the people that were connected to you and your son. I wish you didn't feel guilty about this, as it only makes this moment worse. I hope you are with people you love and people who love you and that you care for each other in this moment of grief, and pay due respects to your son.

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